RAW: /g/1115577/0ccf45120b/
LIB: https://www.doujinshi.org/book/1039550/

Translated by: Petra_lal
Edited by: master117
QC by: AAW

Petra_lal's first translation. Please feel free to criticize.

I have to say, that is some good poi :D

Base +4, Megaton +39, jindoko90 +6, Chornlajorn +3, Hakrei +26, darklord1235 +9, Lostalgia +8, Daddyfatsack +6

Nice job!But can some one tell me what ">3" means?

Base +3, Chornlajorn +3, see-eff +6

Beautiful, delicious poi.

Base +14, Chornlajorn +3, Zr44d +11, darklord1235 +9, bunnygunny +6, Lostalgia +8, Daddyfatsack +6, Hakrei +26

@wanguishiju

<3 is a heart ❤
The original had both drawn hearts and hearts in text. I kept the drawn hearts, and replaced the text ones, since they were in the middle of textboxes.
I found no good looking heart, so I used <3, which is universally recognized.

Base +10, Chornlajorn +3

Poi/Poi

Would poi again, poi.

Base +7, bunnygunny +6, see-eff +6, Daddyfatsack +6, overpo +6

>3 looks like ice-cream...

Base +5

Nice poiunding, poi.
Thanks TL group, poi to poi poi de geso~ nyan >3

Base +7

Nice fucking tits wow

Base +6

I'll wait for Shigure's one :)

Base +5, Chornlajorn +3

So cute, poi.

Base +6, see-eff +6

Reasons why she is my wife in the game :)

Base +7

@I love Zalim I'm working on translating the shigure kuronisiki one this week.

Base +4

Well, since you did say feel free to criticize...

page 2:
フロの時しか休む間がないな -> I guess I have no choice but to rest during my bath...

Not technically wrong after rereading it but you structured the English in a way that almost anyone would think means something else. Would be better with something like "The bath's the only time I get to relax"

他の艦娘にバレたら俺がどやされるだろうが -> I wonder if I'll feel better when I tell the other fleet girls?

Not sure where you got this at all really. It's supposed to be the guy worrying what will happen if someone sees them. Like, "If the other fleet girls see us, I'll get shouted at" or something along those lines

page 3:
そうだ てーとくさん体洗ってー -> That's right admiral, wash my body.

Lost the tone here, by going with "that's right" instead of something like "oh yeah..." or "anyways" you're making it sound way more assertive than it really is

提督に向かって何だその生意気な体は -> Geez, admiral, what's with that body of yours?

You mixed this one up so badly you changed who's thoughts it was, lol. It's the admiral thinking she's being cheeky showing off her body and asking him to wash her. It's not her thought bubble at all.

男物のボディタオル -> men's towels

ボディタオル are not towels, they're washcloths (at least generally, and especially here considering the context)

page 4:
てーとくさん夕立のお胸気になるっぽい？ -> Admiral, my chest seems to be giving you trouble, poi?

While maybe you COULD say it's giving him trouble (ie, trouble not looking at it / getting distracted by it) that makes it sound like he's having a hard time washing it. I'd probably go with "do you like my chest that much?" or "is my chest that interesting?" or something along those lines

さっきからそこばかり洗ってるっぽい -> I just washed there a little bit ago, poi

Misunderstood ばかり here, she's not saying she just finished washing. It's the "only" definition of ばかり so she's saying something more like "That's the only place you've been washing"

It gets better there since it's sorta after the longer textboxes of the intro and into much easier sentence structure/content but there are still a few big ??? translations here and there. I'd definitely suggest brushing up on your jp a little more, especially if you plan on working on anything with significant amounts of dialogue

Base +5, Chornlajorn +3, Daddyfatsack +6, see-eff +6

@floydo Thanks for that, I only took 1 year of jp so a lot of this is new vocabulary, kanji and grammar constructions for me. Hopefully I can make future translations more accurate than that.

Base +4, see-eff +6

Look at her feet on Pg18. Those proportions... something is off.

Base +6, see-eff +6