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HentaiVerse

Corrupted fairies (TheBlackPharaoh)

Western
Posted:2019-09-03 01:13
Parent:None
Visible:Yes
Language:English  
File Size:1.05 MB
Length:3 pages
Favorited:98 times
Rating:
61
Average: 3.00

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Posted on 03 September 2019, 04:39 UTC by:   Elekikiss    PM
Score +236
I don't know if BlackPharaoh will read this but...
The appeal of corruption isn't so much the end result but the process of doing it. Corruption done well shouldn't be a one-button non-resistible mind nuke that instantly changes people to what you want, they should be able to resist it, such that the villain has to mind break them alongside the corruption.
People want to see the characters being defiant, desperately trying to resist, BEFORE they turn evil... and in the case of multi-character works like these, some do successfully escape the corruption for a time before they're ultimately corrupted further and stronger than the others because they're more thoroughly mind broken as a result.
And often times, it's not done through just sex, but psychological manipulation. Making a character feel isolated or hated by others, then making the character feel desired by the corruptor. Or getting them used to sex then releasing them back to their normal lives so that they'd come back themselves because they want the euphoria of sex again, that sort of stuff.
If you read practically any other corruption story, they all go through all of these steps.
This is why The Inner Joke isn't getting critical comments, while Forsaken Souls has a ton of them. With Inner Joke, even if there is no dramatic tension because we all know Wonderwoman is basically already the Joker's bitch, we get to see her go from being defiant, to denying the feelings, to enjoyment, and then total submission. We get the full range of mind breaking. (Btw, check the tag definition, Inner Joke does not have corruption)
With Forsaken Souls, after the first two fall, it's just a routine, there's 0 resistance as everyone is corrupted unceremoniously... Just like what happened here in literally a single page. It's undramatic, boring, and for people who look for corruption specifically, ungratifying.
For someone who is looking just for transformation, none of this matters, but at that point, you might as well make a work that drops corruption, since the corruption part seems to be consistently full of disappointment.

In the case of this specific comic, it should've been just one of them captured at the start, and them desperately clutching to hope until the last moment, while being corrupted through sex, (can just use something generic like: everytime I make you cum, you slowly become more demonic) then Erza coming in for a big damn hero moment, only to be beaten down... And the despair makes the corruption complete. Then you can make a reveal of "Erza" actually being an illusion and either her having already been corrupted, or now the next target.
That would've made the story already more interesting, and for the people who already know Fairy Tail, give them a degree of investment into the story, because they'd "want" to see the heroes successfully resist (although they actually don't want that). The tension as the heroes slowly slip to failure is what makes the genre interesting. When with practically 0 build up the characters get corrupted, there's no mincing words, it's boring.
Posted on 03 September 2019, 07:53 UTC by:   kryton73    PM
Score +67
#1. Commissioned works usually have restrictions on them for length and breadth. You can't expect an artist to put in so many steps of slow corruption when the patron didn't ask and pay for it. #2. Dual panel "before and after" corruption panels are incredibly popular in the community so there has to be an audience out there for single step corruption art. #3. Not everyone has the same likes and dislikes as you do. When giving suggestions and criticism, speaking as if representing the views of everyone ends up undermining your point because NOT everyone shares your opinion. What's boring for you personally may be great for someone else.
Posted on 03 September 2019, 10:01 UTC by:   Djynn    PM
Score +46
Even if I agree with Elekikiss on the "best" corruption, Kryton is right on these points
Posted on 03 September 2019, 16:17 UTC by:   MitchellTF    PM
Score +29
That said, a problem is, despite having more SPACE in his deeper works...BlackPharaoh has little more depth. A quick before/after, or a one-shot, is fine...but BlackPharaoh seems to have never gone beyond that style, despite having more space.
Posted on 03 September 2019, 17:57 UTC by:   Justray    PM
Score +13
At least 20 pages too soon.
Posted on 05 September 2019, 07:29 UTC by:   Elekikiss    PM
Score +41
As a response to Kryton, those are valid points, but here's the thing.
Criticism isn't made of an author or their works because the critic is mean spirited, or doesn't like the author, it's because they want to see the author doing better, that criticism is made. That's exactly why I point out how one of the other works of the author does better than the others. So that they could know what they're doing that works, and improve on that.
That being said, let's get the first two out of the way:
#1: I was unaware this was a commission... but to be fair, the criticism is still valid of BP's works at large... and besides, even in a minimalist approach, all it really takes is actually showcasing a few steps of this on-screen through 3~4 panels. Panel 1: "No!" Panel 2: 'Oh no, it feels good!' Panel 3: "I don't wanna cum!" Panel 4: "CUMMING!" *transforms while cumming* This can still be done in a single page for a short work, and while it's still not much, it's at least something and retains a sliver of narrative tension. In the 6 panels that BP uses to transform them in page 2 while they speak, he could've instead crammed all the existing dialogue into a single panel, show them either being fucked or otherwise sexually stimulated in panel 2, crying as the transformation starts in panel 3, shock at the transformation (whether it's ongoing, or done) in the 4th, another wave of sexual gratification on the 5th, then showing glee at their new form in the 6th. So it's not a problem of how little space/time he has.
#2: As for there being a niche for dual panel before and after corruption, unless those characters visually look mostly unaltered, I'd say it panders far more into the transformation crowd, corruption being more or less incidental.
The only work I've seen (which isn't just some 1 page commission) that only has a before and after image is Monster Girl Encyclopedia, but they have a short story to go with every transformation, so that doesn't go along with your point.
--
#3: I admit, I do come across as though I am acting as the representative of a wider audience; while that is not my intention... it happens to be the case that I'm arguing from a point of literary analysis, which tries to identify universally shared traits of what people find enjoyable and not-enjoyable in works of literature. Therefore, by nature of literary analysis, it makes it seem like I'm speaking for more people than myself... Because that's kind of the whole point of literary analysis.
If you want the more neutral, non-specific version of the critique:
Each genre has some 'tropes' that people want to see either portrayed, subverted, or played with. That was what I was mostly addressing with my other post. The tropes often seen in corruption is mental manipulation, mind break, Stockholm syndrome, induced dissatisfaction, moral degeneration (often prolonged and step by step), among others. And since this is a hentai/porn-site, the corruption is almost always driven through sexual gratification.
Additionally, all good stories (except in the case of a deconstruction of narrative structure itself) universally feature the same narrative structure: Call to Adventure, Rising Action, Climax, Falling Action, Resolution. It's the basics of Drama, which has been followed since the time of the Greeks for the simple reason that this works.
Now given that background: the problem I'm positing is that, in BP's works featuring corruption, the tropes of corruption is either never played out, or only exists in trace amounts... And due to the way corruption is mishandled, there's no drama, and narrative structure suffers greatly from lack of any real rising or falling action.
--
As for the other part of your reply: there's like almost 8 billion people in the world; you're bound to have someone who enjoys even the worst written of stories. Heck, we have some best seller books in the US featuring the most abusive, unethical relationships on two characters completely lacking any... character. So saying that "not everyone shares your views" to undermine what I said is fallacious at best. In fact, this is the reverse-fallacy for Argumentum Ad Populum (which sadly doesn't have its own name), and/or reverse-fallacy of the hasty-generalization fallacy. (Basically, "not everyone agrees with you, thus you're wrong, is a logical fallacy.")
--
What I've said amounts to this: 1) there seems to be a recurring pattern that BP's works tend to lack the elements of writing that create drama, and they come across as less-interesting for it. Saying that there is a lack of dramatic elements isn't an opinion; it's a statement of observation - an observation that has been backed by many in previous threads. Saying that the lack of dramatic elements make a story boring isn't an opinion, it's a (pretty much) universally agreed upon facet of narrative story telling. And, 2) there seems to be a recurring pattern of BP's works throwing in corruption as an afterthought, but labeling the whole work as such, despite hardly engaging in any of its tropes on a substantial level. Forsaken Souls is only corruption on the superficial level; if we're not told that it's corruption, it can easily be considered to be mind control (of the mental-rewiring variety)
Posted on 07 September 2019, 19:20 UTC by:   78jkhj56    PM
Score +7
I agree with Elekikiss all in except one point:

"For someone who is looking just for transformation, none of this matters..."

Most people who like transformation, regardless of what kind, also prefer them to have at least several transitions (i.e. a process); corruption isn't alone in this regard. But corruption does usually require more development than most other kinds of transformations because the changes associated with a corrupted character are mostly psychological, opposed to physical, which are much harder to convey visually. Breast expansion is an example of a type of transformation that requires far less development by comparison because it's all (or nearly all) physical. Anyway, I suppose my point is this comic doesn't appeal much to transformation-lovers either because there is very little in the way of actual transformation going on here. And a succubus isn't much different outwardly, physically, from a regular human being, so it has even less appeal (often the more dramatic a transformation is the better it is, to a degree).

Also, in regards to kryton73, it's hard to take your statements seriously because they sound like exaggerations. For example, how did you determine that dual-panel, before and afters, are "incredibly popular"? Is it because you see more of them (than several-page works)? You see more of them because they're quicker and easier for artists to make, and because they usually don't charge for them. That doesn't necessarily make them more popular it just makes them more numerous. And being more numerous doesn't necessarily make them better either. It's essentially a quality vs. quantity argument. One good work that is several pages long can be better than thirty dual-panel, before and afters, and take substantially less time to create. Another thing, what part of Elekikiss's statement made you interpret they were speaking for "everyone"? At most, they wrote as if speaking for a majority. And at several times they used specific examples to prove that they were, in fact, speaking for a majority. That doesn't undermine their point if anything it makes it stronger.
Posted on 17 September 2019, 18:12 UTC by:   Ficfactor    PM
Score +18
I commissioned this set, and while I would have loved to have the sequence go on significantly longer, that takes lots of time and money.

I tried to frame a scenario where a reader of the original series would instantly recognise the situation at hand (our heroines have been captured by the arc villain's lieutenant, and are being held in the evil science tubes that transform mages into loyal demons). I really wanted to hit three beats: Erza's declaration that she would never submit, the transformation, and the declaration of submission.

I understand that to many, the middle portion is the main draw of these types of work. I enjoy a detailed, drawn-out TF, too. But I also equally care about showing the victims undermining their previous declarations and betraying their former allies and ideals. So I dedicated equal time to each of the three beats.

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